Recognizing Challenges – Designing Responses

Our Parshah begins with HaShem declaring. פִּינְחָס בֶּן-אֶלְעָזָר בֶּן-אַהֲרֹן הַכֹּהֵן, הֵשִׁיב אֶת-חֲמָתִי מֵעַל בְּנֵי-יִשְׂרָאֵל, בְּקַנְאוֹ אֶת-קִנְאָתִי, בְּתוֹכָם; וְלֹא-כִלִּיתִי אֶת-בְּנֵי-יִשְׂרָאֵל, בְּקִנְאָתִי. לָכֵן, אֱמֹר: הִנְנִי נֹתֵן לוֹ אֶת-בְּרִיתִי, שָׁלוֹם Pinchas ben Elazar, ben Aharon the priest, diverted My jealous anger away from the Israelites when I was violently furious with them in my jealous anger, so that I didn’t consume Israel with my jealous anger.” Therefore I grant him my covenant of shalom. Someone is very angry! As our Parshah opens HaShem is just turning away from an outpouring of divine anger fueled by jealousy. HaShem is angry that Israelite men have been prostituting themselves with Midianite women, and jealous (can we say that?) about Israel becoming intimate with Ba’al Pe’or. Yet in the space of two verses, Torah moves from divine anger to divine peace – shalom – in its full and complete (get it ) meaning. We might ask, how can HaShem be angry at the people and the Midianites more than at Pinchas?  They committed idolatry; Pinchas killed people! Perhaps it is as simple as If were to rank the Aseret HaDibrot in order of importance, then a lesser violation (Pinchas)  was committed to stop the ongoing commission of a greater violation (Cozbi & Zimri and all the other idolatrous fornicators). From anger to peace – now there’s a sorely needed model and motto for our times. Although we may not want to read this story too closely, if that is where we are trying to go. Because, in just four more verses we are commanded to – צָרוֹר – trouble and bother the Midianites because of their complicity in the doings. Zur, the slain woman’s father, is now referred to as a prince of Midian rather than as   merely a head of household. HaShem has moved the Midianites alongside Amalek in the top ten list of Israel’s enemies. Midian – according to Rashi – deliberately prostituted their daughters in order to lead Israel into worshipping Ba’al Pe’or.  Not just their daughters but even the daughters of royalty.

Skipping over the rabbinic explanations of the discrepancy between Moab and Midian, we are left with two questions: How does HaShem move from being consumed with anger to handing out covenants of peace on the one hand, and issuing hostile orders on the other? How might we learn from HaShem’s model individually and in our wide variety of collections, to make the same moves? Peace is not handed out to the Midianites, but specifically to Pinchas and to a lesser extent the remainder of Israel, because the plague is stopped.  Add to this the census that follows, and we can assert that HaShem is no longer angry with Israel, even if a full forgiveness hasn’t been granted. (That would wait for Yom Kippur). But certainly the anger is abated, as the incident is over. Why is Midian not forgiven as well?  Remember that the trouble starts with Moab, and then the text mentions Midian. But only the Midianites are to be harassed. Why? Because for them, according to some interpretations, the incident is not over. They continue attempting to seduce Israel into idol worship. Therefore they must be צָרוֹר – which can be translated as “troubled” or “harassed”. This is the word at the root of Mitzayim (מצר”ם). So Israel in some way does to Midian what was done to Israel in Mitzrayim. In our story, Israel faced a spiritual threat. In other parshiot, the threat is physical. There are a variety of reasons and causes for challenges to Israel’s well-being and even our very existence.  Hmmm. Just like Israel  (both the state and all of klal yisrael) today.  It is impossible to know – or certainly to agree – on appropriate responses. About the best we can do is look at HaShem’s grant to Pinchas.  What is given?  בְּרִיתִי, שָׁלוֹם Pinchas does not receive only a “covenant of peace.” He receives, in the words of the KBH, “my convenant of peace.”  There is an element of relationship between the KBH and Pinchas. The connection, as it were, between Pinchas and HaShem is made stronger. Our challenge is to remember to  measure our intentions and actions against this test; will they bring us closer to the KBH. Then we may be fortunate through our deeds to reduce anger and increase peace in the world. Shabbat  Shalom

What Shall We Make of Pinchas?

Our Parshah begins with HaShem declaring. פִּינְחָס בֶּן-אֶלְעָזָר בֶּן-אַהֲרֹן הַכֹּהֵן, הֵשִׁיב אֶת-חֲמָתִי מֵעַל בְּנֵי-יִשְׂרָאֵל, בְּקַנְאוֹ אֶת-קִנְאָתִי, בְּתוֹכָם; וְלֹא-כִלִּיתִי אֶת-בְּנֵי-יִשְׂרָאֵל, בְּקִנְאָתִי. לָכֵן, אֱמֹר: הִנְנִי נֹתֵן לוֹ אֶת-בְּרִיתִי, שָׁלוֹם Pinchas ben Elazar, ben Aharon the priest, diverted My jealous anger away from the Israelites when I was violently furious with them in my jealous anger, so that I didn’t consume Israel with my jealous anger.” Therefore I grant him my covenant of shalom. Devotees of Law and Order (competing with ER for the all-time “TV series that is dead and won’t die” award), CSI and the like might be the quickest to ask about Pinchas’s state of mind at the time of the killing.  Did he think about right and wrong? Was he seized by an irresistible impulse (See Anatomy of a Murder).  Or did Pinchas save even more from dieing than the 24,000 reported killed.  Was he therefore acting for the greater good? HaShem’s response appears to be a reward for his  zeal in skewering Zimri ben Salu and Cozbi ben Zur at the end of last Shabbat’s parshah.  He later leads an army against Midian which kills the kings of Midian and captures all the women, children, flocks and goods.  Oh… and burned the cities and encampments with fire. Pinchas does not exactly come across as “a man of peace”, which is of course the “usual” definition of shalom.  Except perhaps in comparison to Moshe, who when he realizes that the women and children are still alive, commands that they all be killed, except for young women who have not known men (since this is the Bible, he of course means) in the Biblical sense. According to Nehama Leibowitz, even the rabbis of the Yerushalmi agreed that Pinchas’s act was unsanctioned and in defiance of all the legal strictures and procedures stated in the Torah. How should we interpret Pinchas’s behavior and the response that HaShem provides?  We should start with the recognition that our generation is not the first to be bothered by this story and to wrestle with it. One response is to find a way to “be OK” with Pinchas.  The midrash has it that the leaders of the generation reacted by moving to excommunicate Pinchas. HaShem’s grant of an everlasting priesthood to Pinchas and his descendents is a response to this. The KBH vouches for Pinchas, judging that his motivations were pure; that he was acting only to advance k’vod hashem, the glory and honor of HaShem. Does this intepretation make us feel better? or worse?

Another response is to make the exchange about Pinchas’s spiritual state. Having murdered – justifiably or not – two people, he is agitated and in a state of emotional turmoil.  So the with the brit shalom HaShem is quieting Pinchas’s soul and his emotional state.  Indirectly, this may also make Pinchas more suitable to act as a priest, which requires very careful control of one’s actions in order to correctly follow the rites and rituals of the sacrificial service. Rabbi Zvi Miller in Monday’s Salant Center eMussar mailing considers the Pinchas incident along with the transition of power between Moshe and Joshua.  Moshe tells Joshua hazak v’amatz in Parshat Va’Yelech. Moshe encourages Joshua in his new role, even though Joshua was his greatest student.  Pinchas, says Rabbi Miller, “encouraged himself” to be courageous and stand up to the immoral activity of Salu and Cozbi.  He calls what Pinchas did a “little bit of pulling himself together”, and finishes by saying “his heroism saved the entire Nation of Israel.”! (exclamation point by the author) The Gemara (Bavli – Masechet Sotah 45A) makes a further effort of heaping praise on Pinchas. Referring to the war against Midian in BaMidbar 31. It states that Pinchas went to battle to exact judgement on the Midianites for having sold Joseph into slavery. Pinchas’s grandfather is Putiel, a name elsewhere associated with Joseph. (Biblical characters often have multiple names.)  There are two possible plays-on-words with Putiel. One is derogatory and associates the name Putiel with Jethro, who “fattened his calves for idolatry”. The word for fatten is pitteepitpe -close enough for Midrashic wordplay.  Since Jethro fattened his calves, he can be called Putiel, hence the other tribes could criticize Pinchas for his actions, and call him a son of an idolater.  The alternate reaction is to associate Pinchas with Joseph, who mastered (petpei) his passioned.  Therefore Pinchas has not only a distinguished lineage, but was in full control of his emotions when he slew Zimri and Cozbi. An argument over  the merits of Pinchas serves well as a proxy for discussions about Israel today.  As in Pinchas’s time, Israel is under threat in our day.  As at Shittim, there are both external and internal threats and causes for concern. In some way we are supposed to be like Pinchas, and do something like turning away the wrath of HaShem. We are called by this Parshah to find our own way of acting with zeal on behalf of G-d and Israel.  Like Pinchas, we are given no direct instructions on what to do and how to do it. May we act to protect and strengthen Israel in a way that brings us also HaShem’s covenant of shalom.

Generosity in Hard Times

I’m currently in training and raising money for the Waves to Wine Multiple Sclerosis bike ride. The Bay Area event will take place one week before Rosh HaShanah.  What a way to prepare body and soul for the most holy of our seasons and – as the sages call it – the most festive day of the year – Yom Kippur; the Day of Atonement.  Or, as someone a long time ago expressed it, the Day of At-One-Ment. Of course I have been soliciting family, friends, contacts, study partners (OK, everyone for whom I have an email address that isn’t a client) since mid-June.  In this hard times, people are digging deep, and to date – in the space of less than three weeks contributors have pitched in $1500.00.  As I wrote in a thank you note to one of the contributors, from whom I have borrowed this phrase (modifications my own and it will only make you chuckle if you heard what Gene originally said in our Mussar group) “I am surrounded by generous people!”

If you are reading this post and are moved to join the growing list of supporters, please head on over to http://main.nationalmssociety.org/goto/artgould and Wave that Flag (obligatory Grateful Dead reference), er, I mean, Abuse That Plastic – for a good cause. Or, as several have done, send me a note that “the check is in the mail”.  Oh… and don’t forget to actually put the check into the mail . I’ve put this in the “Torah Commentary” category, borrowing from Hazon who borrowed it from Rabbi Arthur Waskow, who said “The Torah is a commentary on the world, and the world is a commentary on the Torah.” Now to find time today to go out and ride my donkey past angels waving flaming swords.

Better to be blind?

The Salant Foundation article of June 9 comments on the Pirkei Avot  saying of Rabbi (Yehuda HaNasi, compiler of the Mishnah). He said (translation from Danby Mishnah, p. 455). ‘Look not on the jar but on what is in it; there may be a new jar that is full of old wine and an old one in which is not even new wine.”  Rabbi Zvi Miller observes that it is human nature to look at the external facade of a person and make assessments about the value of the person inside. We can look at our own behavior and probably validate Rabbi Miller’s statement.  Or we can look to social science, as it’s not too hard to find studies (or reports about them) correlating height with success in business.  Here’s an old one from Slate for a starting point http://www.slate.com/?id=2063439 . Tall and attractive persons get doors opened for them that remain closed to the ordinary looking individual, and the self-aware among them will confess this is true. We sometimes watch Extreme Makeover – Home Edition (someone I love is a sucker – in the best possible way – for feel-good stories).  Sometime in the past couple of years, there was an episode centered around a blind young man, who at one point observed that he considered being blind a blessing, because he simply could not judge people by their appearance. My parnassa involves spending time on the phone with people I have never met. Inevitably, one conjurs up a mental image to go along with the voice.  It is rare, upon meeting the person or seeing a picture, that the actual image matches the mental image. People usually do not look how they sound.

Although so much would be lost without the ability to see,  what would the world be like if we had been created without sight?  Would we have found other senses to use in order to get to places of envy, jealousy? Would we have still needed the tenth commandment? Would the world be a more harmonious place if we could not see our external shells and only see the person within.  Living in darkness might make the world a brighter, better, place. One of my rabbinic colleagues on the Arava Institute bike ride (here we go again) shared a compelling interpretation of the Talmudic statement about the earliest possible moment for saying the morning Shema. In brief, it says that – if you cannot recognize your friend from a distance of four paces, it is still too dark to say the morning Shema.  The interpretation he shared…. that if from four paces you cannot truly see that any individual is your friend – you are living in darkness and the day has not yet dawned. As Rabbi Miller concludes “since every person is created in the Likeness of HaShem, every person is an entity of goodness. If we focus on the good parts of others, we will see them in a positivelight, and foster much love and partnership within our community.” It should only come to pass, bimhera uv’yamenu.

Modern Technology and an Ancient Custom – Birkat HaHama

The once every twenty-eight years opportunity for pronouncing Birkat HaHama (Blessing of the Sun) is fast approaching. It will be celebrated on the day of Erev  Pesach.  There are all sorts of web resources available for reading up on this custom.  Basically – and skipping over hard-core astronomical science – our tradition has it that every twenty eight years the sun is in exactly the position it occupied when first created. A selection of issues involving Birkat HaHama include: Given the principle of performing a Mitzva with zeal and alacrity (i.e. the first opportunity), and given that the b’racha should be said as soon as one sees the sun, does one daven Shacharit first and then say Birkat HaHama, or the other way around? Can you eat before saying the b’racha?  (Halacha generally forbids eating in the 30 minutes before performing a time-bound Mitzva.) Since this is an “opportunity mitzvah”, should one make special efforts to see the sun?  (You’re only obligated to say the bracha if you see the sun.) If the sun is covered by clouds (so you can’t say the bracha), but you are davening where you could see the sun if it appears, and it appears in the middle of reciting the Shema, should you interrupt your recitation to recite Birkat HaHama? (Normally, interrupting your recitation of the Shema – and its accompanying blessings – is a big no-no).  Turns out the answer is “Yes” you should interrupt the Shema, if necessary, because Birkat HaHama (in these circumstances) is a mitzva with a very limited window of opportunity.

If you are involved in a Brit Milah (which also, by tradition, should be performed as soon as possible on the eighth day), which takes precedence?  Brit Milah is a time-specific mitzvah, as is Birkat HaHama.  Brit Milah takes precedence for two reasons; it is mandated by the Torah whereas Birkat HaHama is only a “rabbinic commandment”, and it takes precedence by another rule – Tadir Ve’she’eno Tadir Tadir Kodem – (Regularly scheduled mitzvot take place over non-regularly scheduled mitzvot) .  But (don’t you love Talmudic reasoning? It’s way better than crossword puzzles or Sudoku for keeping your brain fresh and young) if it’s a cloudy day and proceeding with the bris will cause the only opportunity for Birkat HaHamah to be missed, then (you guessed it), you postpone the bris for a few moments to say Birkat HaHamah. So, you’re still wondering… hey Rabbi Art… what about that modern technology you promised in the article headline?  According to Daily Halacha (which is the source for all of the above) the Satmar Rabbi was faced with a situation where heavy clouds were forecast for the day of Birkat HaHamah and there was no reason to expect even the briefest opportunity to recite Birkat HaHamah. What to do?  What to do?  He told his Hasidim to get on an airplane so they could fly above the clouds, see the sun, and say the B’rachah!!  Hmmm… wonder if the airlines have a “Birkat HaHama fare”?

A Great Mystery of Creation

One of the greatest mysteries of creation is why the first two humans ate from the tree of the knowledge of tov and ra.*  According to the creation story, the first independent free will action of Adam and Eve is to choose what is generally labeled disobedience.  Everything has been given to them except one thing, yet that is precisely the thing that they decide they must have.  If Joseph Heller hadn’t written Catch-22 and named Yossarian’s paradox, we would need it now to make Midrash on this part of the creation story. Without the primal act of disobedience, Adam and Eve would have remained forever in the Heavenly Garden, and lived out their lives as the ultimate crowns of creation.  But, had they not eaten of the tree, they would not have exited the garden to live as “normal” human beings, and the Torah could only have been a pleasant fable, completely un-descriptive of the realities of human existence. What if we put a different label on eating from the tree? Suppose it were not an act of disobedience, but acting on aspiration? Maybe a pleasant life as gardeners in paradise was an insufficient challenge for them? What if – by the act of eating from the tree – they invented the very notion of challenging themselves. Perhaps Adam and Eve simply aspired to be “all that they could be.” Hold that thought. Once the Mishkan is complete, Moshe gives it his review, and passes judgement on what has been built. וַיַּרְא מֹשֶׁה אֶת-כָּל-הַמְּלָאכָה, וְהִנֵּה עָשׂוּ אֹתָהּ–כַּאֲשֶׁר צִוָּה יְהוָה, כֵּן עָשׂוּ; וַיְבָרֶךְ אֹתָם, מֹשֶׁה Moshe regarded all the the work. Behold it was done according to Hashem’s commandment; Moshe blessed them. This verse parallels the commandment to build the Mishkan, where HaShem tells Israel, “Build me a mishkan so I may dwell among you.(Israel)” Moshe reviews the completed Mishkan, and then he blesses them (Israel). The commentary Kli Yakar comments on the similarity between this verse and the five times during creation that HaShem views HaShem’s work at the end of the day, and sees that it is good.

The ability to determine that something is good – or bad – is the ability to make judgements. How does Moshe know that the Mishkan is built according to plan? How is it that Bezalel and Oholiab are able to understand and follow a plan? Because humankind has acquired the ability to make distinctions and exercise judgement! Because Adam and Eve at the fruit of the tree of knowledge? Without knowledge, there is no judgement, there is no understanding of plans, there is no making of plans. Of course there are multiple levels of human knowledge, and multiple purposes to which human knowledge can be put.  Knowledge and the ability to make distinctions is by itself a “neutral” ability.  The end may not justify the means, but the end is the measure by which we determine  whether the means have been justly exercised. Our story is about much more than the ability to exercise human knowledge.  The building of the Mishkan is the prime example of using human knowledge and the ability to make distinctions to a higher purpose; to invoke the very presence of the divine. Adam and Eve’s act, which puts distance between human and heaven, is a necessary means for enabling humans to reach for and make space for the divine. “Build me a mishkan so I may dwell among  you.”  In the Gan Eden fable, human and G-d are close because HaShem has made it so.  In our real world, human and HaShem can and will only be close, when it is we humans who want and make it possible for that closeness to happen. Building a mishkan so HaShem will live among us, is the highest exercise of the knowledge of tov and ra. It is the model for how we should live our lives. Shabbat Shalom * Forget everything and everytime you have heard the words tov and ra translated as good and evil. Do this for two reasons. First, because those are English words and so, so much is lost in translation. Second, but more importantly, the use of paired opposites is the Bible’s way of describing a complete continuum. In another context, think of the phrase “from soup to nuts”. This phrase described a complete dinner and not just a couple of food items. The dinner begins with soup and ends with nuts, but the phrase itself encompasses the entire dinner. Similarly the phrase tov v’ra encompasses the entire gamut of human behavior.

פְקוּדֵי – וַיַּקְהֵל The End of the Beginning

This Shabbat we read the double parshah of Vayakhel-Pekudei. By the time we rise and pronounce the traditional formula of Hazak, Hazak v’Nithazek we will have reached the end of multiple beginnings.  We have completed the building of the Mishkan – in all regards according to its plan.  We will have completed the beginning of building ourselves into a nation; maybe not so much completely according to the plan.  And we will have understood one of the great mysteries of creation and learned how humankind is truly like the divine. Building the Mishkan According to the Plan As VaYahkel opens, Moshe again commands Israel to contribute materials, spirit and energy to building a house for HaShem. וְכָל-חֲכַם-לֵב, בָּכֶם, יָבֹאוּ וְיַעֲשׂוּ, אֵת כָּל-אֲשֶׁר צִוָּה יְהוָה. אֶת-הַמִּשְׁכָּן Everyone with a wise heart, come and make all that HaShem has commanded, the Mishkan…[and all its parts] In a development that should warm the heart and encourage the efforts of every synagogue fund-raising effort, the people bring more than is required. They bring so much so that Bezalael and Oholiab report back to Moshe that the people have brought more contributions than can possibly be used.  Shemot 36:5-7 (Say, is it too late to get the leftovers?)

Finally, in the penultimate verse of the penultimate chapter of the Book of Shemot, we read that “According to all that the LORD commanded Moses, so the children of Israel did all the work”.  The Mishkan has been built, and now, as promised, HaShem can live among the Israelites. Commenting on the end of this building saga, Rashi refers to Psalm 90, which we recite in the Shacharit service each day. וִיהִי, נֹעַם אֲדֹנָי אֱלֹהֵינוּ– עָלֵינוּ: וּמַעֲשֵׂה יָדֵינוּ, כּוֹנְנָה עָלֵינוּ; וּמַעֲשֵׂה יָדֵינוּ, כּוֹנְנֵהוּ. Behold, let the pleasant nature of Hashem be on us; let our hands reflect your intentions, establish your intentions in the work of our hands Israel has built a house for HaShem, but (more importantly?) Israel has made its own work of creation, completing the beginning of building itself (ourselves) into a nation. One more chapter, and we will be strong and growing stronger, although a long road lies ahead, just as it does today. And just as HaShem renews each day Hashem’s marvelous work of creation, Israel must create anew each day. Stay tuned to examine how we learn – in this Parshah – to understand one of the great mysteries of creation.

כִּי תִשָּׂא – Mitzvot in this Parshah

According to Sefer HaHinuch there are nine mitzvot in this parshah; four positive and five negative. The mitzvot are 105 – To give half a shekel each year. It applies to all (male) Israelites from the age of twenty and up. It is based on Shemot 30:13. 106 – To rinse our hands and feet when ministering in the sanctuary. It applies to the kohanim and is based on Shemot 30:19-20. 107 – To make anointing oil for each high priest and king. It is an obligation for the community and is based on Shemot 30:31. 108 – That no outsider (anyone not a kohen or King) should be anointed with the anointing oil. It is based on Shemot 30:32 and applies to both adult men and women. 109 – Not to make the anointing oil according to the scriptural formula. It applies to adult men and women. According to the Gemara, anointing oil was never produced except the oil that Moshe miraculously made in the wilderness. So how do we have anointing oil to use when needed? Miraculously, it was “self-replenishing”; whatever was used for anointing was automatically refilled, and there will be oil when the Mashiach comes and the Temple is rebuilt. it is based on Shemot 30:32.

110 – Not to make incense according to the Torah’s formula. The incense works the same way as the anointing oil, and the mitzvah is based on Shemot 30:37. 111 – Not to eat or drink of anything offered up to an idol. This mitzvah applies in all times and places and to both men and women. It is based on Shemot 34:12 and 34:15. 112 – To let the land lie fallow during the Shmitah year. This mitzvah is very similar to what our author describes in Mitzvah 84 that occurs in Parshat Mishpatim. The Shmittah year applies to both men and women, but only in the land of Biblical Israel, and only when Israel is occupied according to the dictates of the Torah. This mitzvah is based on Shemot 34:21, and Mitzvah 84 is based on Shemot 23:11. 113 – Not to eat meat and milk that were cooked together. It applies to all of Israel and is based on Shemot 34:21.

The Objects of our Affection – כִּי תִשָּׂא

This Shabbat we climb to the highest heights and sink to the lowest lows. Israel (us) purifies itself (ourselves) and prepares to receive HaShem’s greatest gift; the very blueprint of creation. Even before the gift itself can be brought down the mountain and celebrated, Israel (us again) debases itself and offers up the greatest rejection that could possibly be imagined.Are we a schizophrenic two timing messed up people, or what? While Moshe sits atop the mountain establishing that HaShem is the One who brought us out of the slavery of Mitzraym, Israel is partying down below and inventing a way to violate the first and most fundamental commandment. Have no other gods before HaShem? We got your other god right here. That we made all by and for ourselves. In the language of the street, what the (expletive deleted) is going on? What are they (us) thinking? We’ve reconfigured the sanctuary seats at Temple Beth Abraham so that we can have a more intimate arrangement on Shabbes mornings when there isn’t an event or speaker. Everything happens on the floor, including reading the Torah. There is no “Torah stand”, so whoever has Hagbah has to hold the Torah until it is time to return the Torah to the Aron HaKodesh. Awhile back I was given the honor of Hagbah and found myself seated hding the Torah for the Haftorah, the special prayers and Ashrei. It was also a Shabbat on which we were announcing the coming Rosh Hodesh. So I was sitting holding the Torah in my right arm and a Humash in my left hand to follow the Haftorah. Eventually I began really feeling it’s weight but since I pump iron I had no urge to shift it to my other arm or change my seated position. Jay Goldberg, seated on my right, leaned over and whispered a comment that called for a response and hinted at a brief conversation. (Its OK – it was about the Haftorah and not frivolous.)

Instinctively I shifted the top of the Torah leftward across my body to lean in close to Jay and whisper my response directly into his ear. This resulted in my holding the Torah on my lap with both my arms around it. Like you would hold a small child or (don’t get ahead of me here) or a loved one. An amazing transformation immediately took place. I could feel a surge of what I – in that moment – could only have described as love as love and affection for the Torah. When it came time to announce the coming Rosh Hodesh I reluctantly gave up the Torah to Jay so he could hand it to the shalach tzibur at the appropriate moment. (it is customary for the Shatz to hold the Torah when reciting the specific day(a) on which Rosh Hodesh will occur.) As we sat back down for Ashrei, Jay offered to hold the Torah. I would have none of that. I wanted, nay, I needed to hold the Torah on my lap. I beleve I felt a momentary surge of jealousy or resentment. How dare Jay Goldberg not hand me back my Torah, my beloved! All because of a subtle shift of position. This, I think, is part of the secret understanding of “the strange incident of the Golden Calf”. We all need a place to put our love and affection. Even the beaten and downtrodden wilderness generation had all the complex drives of Hashem’s most marvelous creation. Individually and collectively, they (us) needed to make a place in their hearts. When we can’t find the right place, we risk choosing the wrong place. If we can’t find any place, we create one. The cosmic distance between right and wrong, between wrong and right, can be traveled with hardly the smallest movement in our position. Hold the Torah to your side with one arm, and feel only the weight of wood and parchment. Wrap two arms around it, and the Torah comes alive as any human being, and we can awake to our love for her teachings and her creator. May we always understand what truly should be the objects of our love and affection. May we always find our way to holding the Torah – and each other – in our hearts. Shabbat Shalom

How much Chutzpah? I Told You So

Its the rare person who can resist the urge to say that certain something. Is there a parent anywhere who can watch their child and walk out the door to get behind the wheel of the car without saying “drive carefully”? The twenty something daughter of friends of ours stopped by before beginning a road trip.  Of course, I absolutely had the compulsion to say the benediction “Drive Carefully”! At time we find ourselves compelled to give a different kind of pronouncement.  There are times it seems impossible to resist saying “I told you so.” Even Biblical characters – or especially Biblical characters – can’t resist certain phrases coming out of their mouths. Here are the Israelites on the verge of escaping Mitzrayim forever, but up against the sea of reeds. Do they give thanks for everything they have recently experienced?  Do they encourage themselves to forge ahead with some verbal positive thinking. Of course not! הֲלֹא-זֶה הַדָּבָר, אֲשֶׁר דִּבַּרְנוּ אֵלֶיךָ בְמִצְרַיִם לֵאמֹר, חֲדַל מִמֶּנּוּ, וְנַעַבְדָה אֶת-מִצְרָיִם: כִּי טוֹב לָנוּ עֲבֹד אֶת-מִצְרַיִם, מִמֻּתֵנוּ בַּמִּדְבָּר Is not this what we told you in Mitzrayim, saying “leave us alone and we will serve Mitzrayim, it is better for us to serve Mitzrayim than to die in the desert! Nothing other than “I told you so!” but did they? In Shemot 5:21 the Israelites tell Moshe that (they fear) Pharoah will kill them by the sword.  At that point, they don’t want to get involved in freeing themselves; they don’t even want to take the risk of being free. What does it mean to say “I told you so”? Often it is code for “you have screwed up…and now I have to pay the price…so now I am going to extract a price from you. “I was right. You were wrong so pay up by admitting I was right when I told you so. Sometimes it is a way of saying “me!, me!, me! The world is not thinking enough about me.”  At other times it is code for “I am afraid of what is going to happen.”

Why the fear? Because often life does not unfold the way we expect or want it to. Fear is the result, but sometimes fear can be the cause. Fear that another prediction of woe will be ignored and come true. Beshalach opens with these words וַיְהִי, בְּשַׁלַּח פַּרְעֹה אֶת-הָעָם, וְלֹא-נָחָם אֱלֹהִים דֶּרֶךְ אֶרֶץ פְּלִשְׁתִּים, כִּי קָרוֹב הוּא: כִּי אָמַר אֱלֹהִים, פֶּן-יִנָּחֵם הָעָם בִּרְאֹתָם מִלְחָמָה–וְשָׁבוּ מִצְרָיְמָה וַיַּסֵּב אֱלֹהִים אֶת-הָעָם דֶּרֶךְ הַמִּדְבָּר, יַם-סוּף; וַחֲמֻשִׁים עָלוּ בְנֵי-יִשְׂרָאֵל, מֵאֶרֶץ מִצְרָיִם. When Pharoah released the nation, Elohim did not lead them on the Plishtim road; it was close. Elohim thought “lest the nation be fearful when it sees war, and return toward Mitzrayim”. Elohim led the nation on the wilderness road, toward Yam Suf. Bnei Yisrael went up armed from the land of Mitzrayim. There is a powerful lesson in this story. Even before the Israelites come to apparent danger trapped between the pursuing Egyptians behind them and the waters before them, HaShem has already taken care of any danger to them. He leads them in a way that will be safe, and again provide a vivid demonstration of his power. Yet they (we) resist.  Because they wereliving in fear and did not recognize they were on the verge of their ultimate deliverance. It is easy in our time and place to fall prey to the many ways of saying “I told you so.” Our country is undergoing wrenching changes, and all around us we see and hear takes of woe. In modern Israel our people seem again to be trapped on all sides by mortal danger. When we are already being delivered, if we can but recognize it. Shabbat Shalom and please…Drive Carefully